#1037 - Woody's Bar, Tucson, AZ - 3/21/2010

While I was at The Cuff, a member of our party remarked that every gay bar anywhere in the world looks exactly the same.  I will leave this commenter anonymous -- except that his name is Alan and he lives in Vancouver BC, and he once had the audacity to order half-fries/half-salad with his meal in the U.S. (to which our no-nonsense server responded that she'd be "laughed out of the kitchen" if she tried submitting that).

He was exaggerating, of course, but not by that much.  And that seems a bit of shame, doesn't it?  For all the cliches about decorating, entertaining, etc. etc., gay bars themselves (not counting the people who populate them) usually don't have much personality.  There's the leather-theme stuff, the standard techno/dance-floor stuff, and a lot of black walls and floors, and red rope light.  There are a few exceptions of course, but by and large there aren't many times you step into a gay bar and think, wow, what a cool, unexpected sort of place.  That seems like it should happen more often.

I was introduced to Woody's by some folks I at a "Drinking Liberally" meeting that I stumbled upon in another bar.  While the interior is the same boring decor and the cocktails are uncreative, there is a large patio with lots of plush, semi-veiled seating areas that provide it some pleasant and unusual character.

3710 N Oracle Rd., Tucson, AZ 85705 - (520) 292-6702
mywoodysaz.com - myspace - yelp

#1036 - The Shanty, Tucson, AZ - 3/21/2010

The Shanty is not a shanty at all, and it doesn't appear designed for "shanty Irish." Rather, it's a copper-plated, almost upscale, Irish bar and restaurant, which gives little hint of its age (est. 1937) and with (male) servers that look like they all play on the college volleyball team. The large, shady patio is quite nice, but when I go to a "shanty" -- and especially an Irish shanty -- I expect to see an old, red-faced bartender who looks like he's been there for 40 years and a decor that seems to welcome the lower working class. And when I go to a bar that's 70-some years old, I expect a bit more personality, and to feel its age a bit more.

Aside from the old paintings now carefully guarded by ugly plexiglass, the whole interior looks like it could have been slapped together last month from the cookie cutter Irish themed bar template. The service was friendly and I enjoyed the conversations (I'd stumbled into a local meeting of the "Drinking Liberally" group).  And perhaps I was spoiled by a previous string of Tucson bars oozing character (Meet Rack, Kon Tiki, Shelter, Buffet). But the Shanty left me utterly uncharmed.

401 E 9th St., Tucson, AZ 85705 - (520) 623-2664
yelp - dotucson - 10best.com - metromix

#1035 - The Buffet, Tucson, AZ - 3/21/2010

Along with the Meet Rack, The Buffet Bar & Crock Pot places my two favorite dive bars in the country in Tucson.  But while I love the Meet Rack for it's gradually revealing layers of weirdness, it is the crowd and the immediate vibe that make The Buffet a great dive.

 It has the most elemental features of a dive: it is old (est. 1934), it has a ramshackle decor with years of uninvited contributions from patrons, it has cheap and strong booze (with Coors the only beer on tap), and it was full of lively characters on a Sunday night. For Seattlelites, think of the Blue Moon, with a bit wider demographic and even more graffiti.

The Buffet is the oldest bar in Tucson, established shortly after prohibition, although The Shanty up the road a piece has the oldest liquor license (1937), as the Buffet's was suspended a few times over the years. And just as The Shanty is not a shanty at all, there's no buffet at The Buffet -- although there is a crockpot, which holds hotdogs. But it's a grand old place.

538 E. Ninth St., Tucson, AZ 85705 - 520-623-6811
Est. 1933
yelp - metromix - mydivebar.com

#1034 - The Shelter, Tucson, AZ - 3/21/2010

The Shelter is full of mid-century retro goodness, with an emphasis on lava lamps and the Kennedys.  They also serve better than average cocktails -- and more creative.  This is a must-see if you're in Tucson.

4155 E Grant Rd., Tucson, AZ 85712 - (520) 326-1345
dotucson.com - tucson underground - yelp - igougo

#1033 - Kon Tiki, Tucson, AZ - 3/20/2010

I'd heard that Bamboo Ben helped to spiff up Kon Tiki recently, but I was still more impressed by the decor than I expected.  I'd put it up with the Tonga Room among my favorite tiki bars below the Mai Kai line.  I personally favor the lazy afternoons with old regulars to the younger, louder crowd on weekend evenings, but I was happy to see it doing a brisk business.

The appetizer plate, and in particular the ribs, were first rate, and the huge menu of drinks better than average.  Wish I could be there April 10 when a bunch of the tiki folks help out with the relighting of the Kon Tiki torches ceremony.

(More pics)

4625 E Broadway Blvd., Tucson, AZ 85711 - (520) 323-7193
kontikitucson.com - critiki - yelp

#1032 - Urban 7 Martini Kitchen, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/19/2010

Drinks were pretty good, not great.  Decor appeared to be by Abercrombie and Fitch.

4151 N. Marshall Way, Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 548-6327
azurban7.com - azcentral.com - yelp

#1031 - The Coach House, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/19/2010

The Coach House is Scottsdale's oldest tavern (est. 1959), and provides a pleasant, divey alternative to the other clubs in the area, with just the basics (I was advised not to try ordering any drink with more than two ingredients). It was unpleasantly packed on the Friday evening I dropped by during Spring Training and Spring Break, but I eventually managed to squeeze in to the bar for a drink and squeeze out for some air and enjoyable conversation.

The Coach House also has a reputation for over-the-top Christmas lights during the holiday season (see image on their Facebook page).

7011 E Indian School Rd., Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 990-3433
coachhousescottsdale.com - facebook - yelp

#1030 - Trader Vics, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/19/2010

I love Trader Vic's, of course, and this particular visit had the benefits of being on the patio on a warm March night in Scottsdale, where the ubiquitous scents of jasmine and fire pits make the evenings all the more pleasant.  Also, this one is associated with the swanky Hotel Valley Ho, which makes a fine additional stop.

6850 E Main St., Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 248-2000
tradervics.com - hotelvalleyho.com - yelp

#1029 - Howl at the Moon, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

I happily missed the dueling piano session.

7419 E Indian Plaza Dr., Ste A, Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 994-4695
howlatthemoon.com - facebook - yelp

#1028 - Crown Room, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

7419 E Indian Plz., Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 423-0117
myspace - yelp

#1027 - American Junkie, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

This is a sports bar combined with punk rock images (Iggy, Nirvana, etc.) and overly sweet cocktails that appear to have been designed for 13-year-olds.

4363 N 75th St., Scottsdale, AZ 85252 - (480) 990-3000
americanjunkieaz.com - myspace - yelp

#1026 - Loco Patron, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

4228 N Scottsdale Rd., Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 874-0033
locopatron.com - facebook - myspace - yelp 

#1025 - Geisha-a-go-go, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

7150 E 6th Ave., Scottsdale, AZ 85250 - (480) 699-0055
geishaagogo.com - yelp

#1024 - Stingray Sushi, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

A fairly swanky bar and sushi restaurant with in-floor aquariums.

4302 N Scottsdale Rd., Scottsdale, AZ 85250 - (480) 941-4460
stingraysushi.com - yelp

#1023 - Saddle Ranch Chop House, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

This was a sedate, steakhouse the last time I visited, but now is a sprawling, packed center of attention of younger crowds for whatever reason, with a mechanical bull, giant martini glasses filled with cotton candy, and fire pits where they encourage you to roast smores.

4321 N Scottsdale Rd., Scottsdale, AZ 85251 - (480) 429-2263
srrestaurants.com - yelp

#1022 - Shotgun Betty's, Scottsdale, AZ - 3/18/2010

The standard cowgirls-dancing-on-the-bar bar -- only it's in Scottsdale, so the women are hotter.

7330 E. Stetson Drive, Scottsdale, AZ 85251
NewTimes - yelp

#1021 - Lucky Silver Tavern, Tacoma, WA - 3/14/2010

A nifty old dive just down the road from the Java Jive that has been owned and run by the same family since 1966.  It was bingo night when I attended -- I played in for three games and won nothing.  Prizes included a can of sweet corn, a box of Ritz crackers, a battery lighted magnifying glass, and a box of Bodyform panty liners.

I wish I knew how old this place is, but city guides show that it's been around since at least the 50s.

2605 S. Tacoma Way, Tacoma, WA, 98409 - (253) 472-0360
myspace - waymarking - clubplanet

#1020 - Adriatic Grill, Tacoma, WA - 3/14/2010

4201 S Steele St., Tacoma, WA 98409 - (253) 475-6000
adriaticgrill.com - seattlepi - yelp

#1019 - Garbe's Tavern, Chehalis, WA - 3/14/2010

Update: Garbe's Tavern was purchased by new owners and converted into Sidelines Sports Bar in April of 2014.

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This place is a little like The Star up the road with an extra room and two pool tables added. A little less divey (they didn't have any Rainier can wind chimes) and they have a DJ and live music on weekend nights.

Garbe's has actually existed in Chehalis since at least the late 40s, starting out by replacing the Eagle Tavern at 987 Chehalis Ave sometime between 1946 and 1948, and moving to the current address in the late 1970s.

313 NW Chehalis Ave., Chehalis, WA 98532 - (360) 748-4288
virtualtourist - urbanspoon - clubplanet - yelp 

#1018 - Star Tavern, Chehalis, WA - 3/14/2010

Update: The Star Tavern cloed (in 2015?)

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Google Maps listed this place as "closed permanently," -- which was news to the customers and the pleasantly sassy bartender I found there. It's a nice old dive that's been around for a long time (current owners family have run it since the 60s, I was informed). When I visited on a Sunday afternoon there were six customers, all drinking big cans of Busch Light.  I opted for a Dick Danger Ale (brewed in Centralia).

I was a little early for the big Twin Cities Sertoma Club olympics, which spanned Chehalis and Centralia bars with various contests -- pool, darts, shuffleboard, etc.  (Sertoma is a civic group that raises money for deaf youngsters and other charitable causes.)

The Star Tavern appears to have been founded in the 1960s. As per the Historic Chehalis Downtown Walking Tour, the building dates to 1910: "Constructed as the Royal Bakery, the building is constructed of stone and retains integrity in its original design. It is representative of the commercial structures erected in the second downtown. The building has also been a barber shop, apartment building, and a liquor store. In later years it became the local Junior Chamber of Commerce who used the space for rummage sales."

242 NW Chehalis Ave., Chehalis, WA 98532 - 360-748-4222
web site: facebook
chronline - urbanspoon - untappd